Current mood: Bushido-ish
Its now the new year, christmas has found its conclusion, competition grows thick and heady, even more so than my yesterday. School is coming as well, many things will come to a head in a few more days here, so far I have been enjoying my break and training.
School nothing to report, I imagine this will change quite soon, say january 7th, the start of this next semester.
Wrestling.
Still undefeated in wrestling, although I must admit my most recent past competition was skiddish results at best, I found a way to win which is what coach tucker stresses, I beat decent competition as well, however, I didn't look good doing it and I made a great many mistakes. The good news is I can see where a lot of those mistakes were accumulated, and I know of ways to fix them. My goals have changed a bit, I wish to continue being a fierce competitor, but alongside that simple wish for myself, I must try and improve myself every match. To extract something from every competition no matter how good/bad/ugly/pretty the win and degree of competition might be, to always be happy with a win, find anything that I can hold pride in. I have no other real news right now, I'll get back to this soon.
Goodbye
Date posted: January 14, 2008, 2:51 am
Current mood: apathetic
hello, here is my annual report or chronicle of my times. Happy new year to myself or any reader. Classes have begun as of last week, I am trying to find myself falling into better practice and study habits, in order to ultimately better myself, changes have been stunted, though I am attempting to correct my errors, and perfect my qualities in order to reforge a better me. I have started to meditate, because over the past few months I have been dealing with problems, from the typical angst that I continually cannot shake. To sub par performance all over my life, and the lag that has become the movement of progress. As the new year unfolds I hope that I can affix a new way for everything to sit on my proverbial shelf, to appease the ever thirsty voice within that criticizes and challenges every (mis)step I seem to make. I can hardly swallow when I make so many mistakes. I have been making strides, if I can continue with the habits I have set up over these past two weeks as far as studying and working out is concerned I will better myself in those two areas, my personal happiness will remain static, and eventually if I at least achieve some success in those two fields of my being I will be somewhat happy. Still socially I fail, with people in general. I really try but find my time so much better spent trying to do the latter mentioned. I know my voice seems eclectic and confusing, my tone. It is, and that's purposeful, no matter how random and sometimes polar opposite predictable my speech might seem I understand and that's what matters ultimately.
news wrestling
I have been thus far undefeated in my duel meet schedule, which is the culmination of two things:
- A) I have been wrestling progressively better as I do each season, as the seasons end hastens.
- B) I have been working with some great coaches and been trying to really open up my style and become truly bettered by them.
Don't get me wrong, with each person who has tried to help me I have made active efforts to understand, imbibe and be ready to regurgitate the said info, however, in my heart of hearts I can see now that I didn't take in what they had to offer, because of narrow mindedness, cockiness, stupidity, or ignorance, quite possibly all of the above. I am making strides to fix these prolonged problems, hopefully my different attitude will continue well into and through my collegiate career.
School
School as said before is going, I have been working on better studying regiments, and have been reading, reviewing my notes and have made active attempts to beseech others for tutoring and help in and outside of the room. Hopefully after all is said and done I can achieve an acceptable grade for this semester because last semester was pathetic and I still feel sick and embittered about that whole ordeal. Change is measured in the amount of progress as one can easily see, so progress is what I will make, upward progress.
That's about all I have for now, I hope everyone is well.
Peace and chicken grease.
Date posted: December 15, 2007, 12:43 pm
Current mood: appreciative
Life:
In general I feel as if I have acquiesced into a lifestyle which is more suited for me, from a lesser stable and easy going one. Stable in the fact that I stagnated in almost every possible way, I sought no improvement intellectually or physically, emotionally I had no one or nothing besides my best of friends and my wonderful family. Don't be confused, that was enough, but to find more is never a problem.
Wrestling
We just recently dueled Edinboro, a top 15 team in the country, needless to say my opponent was to be no push over, Ricky Deubel was his name. We have faced on a few times now, our first meeting he smoked me, as I was inexperienced in the rough and tumble style that sport is in college, a deluge of attrition mixed with a spatter of skill. that is not to say that college wrestling isn't a very technical game, but I find that having big balls goes a long way in this sport.
Our second meeting I bested him, and I think we wrestling a third time wherein he won. every time he has beaten me if twice it has been, were preseason when I am but a shadow of my true wrestling self, I wrestling standoffish and sometimes halfheartedly, as its a terrible arduous season I think subconsciously my body circumvents itself with these predispositions so as to shield and ready it for the quickening that is to come, the regular season.
Friday, dec 14, at 8pm we squared off again, the match went decent, he scored the opening 2 points with a low post single, to which I responded with an immediate escape. Another minute or so had passed before I got my first take down and collected my advantage in riding time. The first period was over. The second period likewise went, with my choice on bottom, an escape and then nothing much but my attempt to remain active. Third period his coaches chose neutral and he was unable to take me down, he did however collect two stall warnings which earned him another point. The match ended at 5-3 in my favor.
I thought that I did everything I had to do to win, but there were times when if I had to I could have scored, that is a fatal error. I need to push the envelop indefinitely until the end of the match, because one cannot determine what might happen at any given time in the match, he cannot forecast what events are to come. thus I must really work harder than physically possible in order to best everyone the very most severe way I can.
School
Schools end hastens to be sure, I have finished my chemistry final, which was rough. On the final a good lot of the material was covered insufficiently or not at all during our regular class lectures. That led to a good many students being stranded on questions and lost to what the answers might be, before the final I had a 78%, I must admit i didn't put my full heart into it, that was a product of that intellectual stagnation to which I referred before, however, I did study hard as I could for this exam, and found myself lost, even after completing the pretest practice, that I might add did little to nothing for me, I felt lost. This isn't my sentiments alone either, a few separate students felt similar or could reveal the same thoughts as I have, as that final was just messed up. Genetics, Math and my Dietetics finals are coming quick. I feel pretty confident in all of these, as I have been and will continue to study for them, hopefully in the end I can be successful in this final stretch of my scholastic year.
That's about it for now world, I hope soon to return with some positive news about my NU match tomorrow at 3.
Wish me luck
Sean
Date posted: September 5, 2007, 11:38 pm
Current mood: appreciative
school.
I just bought all my books today, which added up to 710 dollars after I buy my last $20 course pack. My wallet is completely exacerbated, however, if I'm going to spend I might as well spend on my edumacation. My GPA is terrible as of late, 2.9, it was a decent 3.3 but due to my recent bout of terribly outcomes in classes it has faltered. But, it is what it is. I will work harder in the future, my classes this semester will be a challenge, but a decent one and one I am most sure and ready to take in.
life in general.
I have had fun these past few weeks, despite the absense of my computer until tonight, when I finally have my new comp in, my life has been good. The transient time between moving can be difficult, I believe mine went by as seamless as humanly possibly, only to be furthered in its swiftness by the fact that I have been working a lot. I will receive a 5-700 paycheck in the end of everyting from all the work I have recently done. My new apartment has ample space to allow for two to live in it without being at each others throat. Drews cat has been cooler, and soon I'll have my kitten which will be a good friend for his cat, and someone to keep me company too. All things with my new computer are good, besides the innate vista and the USB data link which should mitigate the process of moving odd info to my new comp, however, it doesn't do that at all, the fact of the matter is, a program which should do it is either fundamentally flawed on my pc, or it just sucks. Either way it won't work. I backed up all of my poetry before my comp went, so, I'll be able to recover most of it, my music however, will be lost which sucks, but thats the breaks. I have still been doing my pushups everynight, (well most nights) with exceptions i've been doing 300 pushups every night.) In the event that I have not chronicled it yet, jenice said yes to jake, so thats lovely for them, I am very glad for them. Moving on-- my money has come in from school, I am still waiting for my pell and will continue to wait ever so patiently, hopefully fortune will be on my side and that money will come soon.
Thats about it for now.
Date posted: September 9, 2007, 10:12 am
Current mood: caffeinated
Everyone has their masterpiece, a place where they can leave their legacy, George washington has the United states, Da Vinci has all of his inventions, the sistine chapel et al (rather than saying everything), I have my bank shot up hill at Putterz into the 18th hole, I also have my championship campaigne against the one arcade game which I beat, the boxing one; after a little over 3 dollars was spent I became victorious. (I am certainly blowing this out of proportion, and for good reason, this win is my biggest achievment to date keys).
School
We just recieved our opening assignment for genetics, which seems to be a true breeze, I know it will get harder, but he asked questions directly relavent w/ the lecture, as opposed to some of my previous professors, (SKELOTORE) who asked discrete and poorly written questions found in the furthest reaches of our books, often said differently at that. I am switching out of trig for this semester to hopefully rekinorder over my previous material and learn it a bit more clear before I attempt to do anything higher. Thats about all I have for now, we have church in a few minutes here, a wrestling BBQ which today doesn't seem to be the best day for a BBQ but free food is free food.
Goodbye!
Date posted: August 8, 2007, 5:58 pm
Current mood: convuluted
Right now.
Not many people can make you feel like an alien in your own body. My friend jake has an uncanny ability to alienate you, even when you could consider it impossible. He has a way of holding things over your head with his domineering personality, such that it becomes barely tolerable. He is a hard fellow to live with, not to say I am perfect or even close to it. I have many peculiarities so to speak that would drive some people up the wall, however, in the instance of today, I was upset at joey; Julie, jakes wonderful sister, has boyfriend named joey, because he broke my chair, that which would have been in my room, and granted, was not in the best of shapes, but it did the job. He breaks it, then after I discovered it, he jokingly says, yea that was me with a smirk on his face. I at this point was upset, as I think its fair for me to be. But jake, the high and pious didn't agree with my anger, next thing I know I got captain platitude breathing down my neck, telling me how in HIS house this and that, well the fact of the matter is, he did pay the lionshare of the rent, I tend to let him have his way on most arguments due to this and his petty fighting style. However, this is the same man that when I said something like for instance, a friend of mine allowing his younger (14 yrs old) brother drink was wrong, would argue that I have no place to say that. If this is so, how does he have a place to judge my reaction? If you ever read this, and can tell me how, please do.
Jake can be a great friend, but I think it will be for the best of both of us for me to be the hell out this house asap, all he does is store things I do wrong in his cupidinous(its not a word, but its simmilar to cupidinously and it should be a word!) brain and unfurl them at will when he is mad, like a woman. I can be this way too, but not to the level he takes it, not that far.
On a bit of a better note, jakes father came to vist this weekend and was very kind to all of us, jake, his good friend nick and I, by the degree that he took us out to eat twice, and bought us some good beer at the brewery, then began to tell us stories from his childhood, which was quite a pleasant experience. He also was good enough to jake, to pay 600 and some odd dollars for the furniture for his new house, jake could have covered that tab, but today Wednesday the 8th, he went out and bought a ring for Jenice, when he departs for california a martally single man, he may come back an engaged one. He is set to propose when he goes and visits her in Los Angeles which is where she is doing a film internship; all bullshit aside with this asshole I pray the very best for him when he goes to propose.School
I have class again tomorrow, our second of three tests, wish me luck oh non-existent audience, I have studied,and am prepared if ever I will be. I feel as confident as one could be.I just need to review a bit more tonight then attack the test with all intentions of success. And thats my only option.
This was the week of the surnivoroac rerippts which is a tale I'll never be able to recant here. My loan has cleared and is being sent to me currently, which is wonderful news, I got a free bed today, queen sized w/ box spring which again is excellent. And over the week edceivre a lsrgi ermbun which I desired for quite some time, hopefully a pier erpi above ictonpl.
I'm off to study wish me luck.
Loveasshole.
Date posted: January 16, 2008, 3:15 pm
Current mood: free
Hello! I am sitting and sipping on some Starbucks in celebration as I just finished the last of my hw for the day, this semester is absolutely ridiculous, after two classes a bit later I'll be forced to go to study tables and attempt to get more work done, which includes but isn't limited to 25 trig problems and two chapters in chem to read problems to do and transpose two days worth of notes. FUCK. Well that's the business and exactly what I signed up for when I chose to challenge myself with this major, oh well you can only reap what you sow.
Sitting at Starbucks, one can observe a ton of douchebags, its excellent the allure for those sorts this rip off coffee shop can attract, I guess that's the way shit works. I must admit, perhaps that's why I am so compelled to come to this place, ain't that a B. Well either way, two practices done today and my body is all but replete, I am done. Every joint, every ligament, but this will build character hah, or at least make me tougher. In practice today I nearly broke my nose through a direct contact with a knee I took today, it bled a slight, but now I have a nodule on the side of my nose the size of a jawbreaker, probably not healthy eh?
We have an off week this weekend which is a well welcomed and deserved break, I am excited to just relax, after that next weekend I have my first challenge in the MAC, Conner Beebe, I believe I have his number so long as I wrestle as I've been and keep wrestling the whole match. Theoretically I should beat everyone in the MAC, the only variable is how I wrestle, train and compete, and to be sure I feel as if I got that part on LOCK. Hopefully my supposition is on point, I suppose we'll find very soon if that's true. I ought to be going my class will be beginning very soon. Wish me luck.
Date posted: August 3, 2007, 3:59 am
Current mood: free
Hello everyone! I am officially starting this thing again, as I have been downright neglectful to all of this work I put into this site, not to mention the good natured coach who provides me all of this. I have an infinite updates in my pathetic little world, isn't that to be expected from such a selfish prick.
The first and perhaps foremost is the fact that I found a room mate for next year, so my payments will be reduced by a bit more than half of what I projected myself to pay. Thus, I have bought myself a few nice things which I wouldn't have been able to afford at a constant rate of 800/mon for 12 months, which is another update, unfortunately I'll be in Ypsilanti all of the year this year, as opposed to 8 months as was my freshman year. However, to become the all American I plan on becoming year round training is imperative. My apartment is of decent size, a bedroom for each of us and bathroom. A decent sized kitchen and a large living room/ dining room, hence the reason its large, its a dual utility room. My roommate is Drew, a guy on my wrestling team. He also has a cat, so I'll be getting a cat which can be friends with his cat, and conversely be socialized proper like for other animals. The extra stuff I'm getting is a new laptop which is going to be a very good one.
Specs Processor-> 2.4 Ghz at 800mhz Physical memory/RAM -> 2024mb of ram (2 slots (which SUCKS, but its enuff ram for now-> the suckage isn't the amount, but the 2 chips rather than one, thus my slots are entirely taken.) HDD-> 80gb (5400 rpms (an average speed hdd, and small, why?) Because I'm buying an external for all media, the 80 is the smallest increment, I would go smaller if I could. dvd superdrive +/- R and lableflash with an unneeded but whatever. Bluetooth-> standard bluetooth, no need I may get rid of this Wireless -> 802.11 b/g/n the latest generation 5x's faster than the previous gen. Ethernet controller -> 10/100 (middle way but good enuff for Ethernet.) graphics card -> 256mb of dedicated, and another 256 of shared (when the shit gets deep and tough to tread through the compy can compensate and use the shared) and a 3 year systemguard + home repair + if I screw up they will repair damages up to the amount of the compy, once thats used I'm screwed. monitor->17' trubrite technology. buying a silicon keyboard protector to protect against pet dander, my hair, my corrosive oils from my skin, particulates, and all other no no's of the keyboard. scanner/faxer/printer-> free so screw it.backpack-> padded and comfortable, to protect my compLOJACK -> FUCK YOU potential thieves, 90% of compies stolen with this technology are recovered. I report it stolen, once the thief uses an Internet connection they are caught, usb datalink to send info from old comp to new external hddthis all is going to work out to be 2500, but... it is some of the best technology available, and with me not being a dick, it should work for a while.
Wrestling!?
I've been working out 4 times a week on the mat, and lifting 1-2 times a week. We have a national champion Byron Tucker from OK state or OK don't quote me, 150lbs and a bad mofo. I'll be working out with him soon, getting my ASS stomped! Oh well though, that'll make me better. Another of my useless expenditures, much more so than the comp is the ps3 I'm buying, for 615, retails at 499 with tax 520 about. Then I'm getting another control 25, four games 60 a piece, so I'm definitely getting the deal here. Some furniture, a desk, entertainment center and a bed for 95(desk & entertainment center) and 50 for a queen sized bed with the box spring. Possibly a 25 dollar book shelf, finally a few toys and purchases for my new cat. So.. Thats my spending..
school
Well, I'm taking a college algebra right now, which I'm having moderate success in, just got crushed on a test, BUT, the prof let me retake a part that she lost, and she did lose it. I did well on it, very well, so I'll do middle way on the test. Homework sets were 85/100 and 89/100 and I just turned another in. HW sets count for 25% of class, this first test counts for another 25% we have two more tests then I'll be done, August 21. Thats about it people. Thanks for reading, and if you didn't read, I really don't care.
Love,
Your stupid friend.
Date posted: August 3, 2007, 7:16 pm
Current mood: free
School
School is as always, simply bushleague, I'm learning a lot of math that I never knew before, which is always good. Key term there is learning, both in that it describes I haven't learned, and conversely that I am getting there. Listening to Pantera right now, doing a terrible cover of black sabbath. Terrible! Anyway, I have my second test next thursday, so this next week will be filled with my studying and preparations, hopefully with a little luck and some time put in I can do better on this one, or better than my last time about. I know the math, I just need to get it down to an intuitive process, so everything is subconscious, no way to lose it in the clutch. I am absolutely broke, by broke, I don't mean i'm down to $50 in my bank account, I mean collectively over three accounts, I have $1.76. My family is going to help me out a bit, send me a few bucks until my 4000 loan comes in, then I'll buy my laptop and furniture, bed, and ps3. Then a few things for the house, then all my expenditures aside from books will be in the pocket.
Nothing else really.
Sean
Date posted: August 21, 2007, 10:59 am
Current mood: great
Class!
It is now over, and not a moment too soon. I now have a two week surcease in the education monsters trickery and taunting. Soon enough I move in to my new place, I have a few wrestling practices to attend to, then I am good to go for this week.
My place is now picked out and I am affixed there for the next year at minimum. Good. I'm leaving, I have the flu or something similar and feel as if an angry troop of globtrotting imigrant migets blugented me with sticks and other blunt instruments of death.
Date posted: September 10, 2007, 11:32 am
Current mood: like a pirate
Hello again, I am sitting here in the wrestling office attempting to pass some time before I make my walk over to the bookstore to pick up one of my last big expeditures for the fall semester. I have already dropped my math course and am now going to re-enter into another after talking to a fellow about overiding my account. Hopefully I can get that done by today so I can begin my new class by wednesday. my chemistry class lab is going to be somewhat demanding, but it seems like it will be fun, there are a lot of people in the class that seem to think themselves better in some way, by their general manner of speaking and acting, i won't let it bother me any further than it has. my genetics class seems fun, with a lot good material that I am exciting to delve into. Reading for it is a bit bland, hence my prolonged stint of reading material, which should have been an hour or so of outlining has already become a few day adventure, but thats to be expected at the beginning of a semester, hopefully I change my attitude within the next few days here and get right. I will begin a harder work out regiment as my weight is still a bit on the heavy side, and needs to be around 138 for alpha certifications, which isn't that bad once I break 140. I haven't done that for quite some time now, and due to that alone this weight loss will be ardous and i'm not looking forward to it. The compeition in the room has been stepped up, but in the very best manner it could, coach d really brings a stregnth to this program that has long since died until he revived me. thats a very promising and powerful proposition in and of itself. I think that is all I need to go on about for now, besides that we have our first team meeting today which should be interesting, a practice, our team bbq last weekend, and our golf outing which from what I understand was a nice fund raiser for us. After alphas this unincoming friday, not this but next I mean. Goodbye for now
Date posted: November 19, 2008, 9:10 pm
Current mood: like a pirate
HAH- So I went through all my posts and got envious of myself for being able to write all this in a calm cool and collected manner. So I decided I should mimic past me/ ubber reality me, and take up this good habits of venting and self preservation that attends the practice of journaling. I also begin writing again because my life has been a shitslide and im going face first down, figure I might as well chronicle a few of this fucked happenings, ok, so where to begin..
Wrestling
Well Fuck you wrestling, in the room i've been a force to be reckoned with, quite literally all these guys have been trying to keep up with me, and failing. Conceded as it is, its true. However- on the competition mat, the contrary is at work, and this I cannot explain. All I know if im planning on reuniting with some of my old methods of madness as to assuage whatever is lingering inside of me, whatever previously was expressed and cannot be now due to one of many issues, so I began writing again , I began reading (minimally, so don't judge me!!!
and I have altered my habits to give myself a bit more down time. I began seeing a sports pysc to try and uncombobulate the distopia that is the capital of my being, (the pimple on my neck is the state building ITS HUGE 
) and just trying to be me, rather than what I expect myself to be, DOESN'T MAKE SENSE, JUST LET SLIDE ON BY PARROT BAY).
Das schule
Despite my best efforts my schooling has been a losing contest, and due to the NCAAs strict bylaws on course competition (meant to protect athletes from being coersed into staying at uni for years on years- good in theory, fucking me over in practice) so now I must change my path for a bit and try my hand at english lit while I complete my undergrad, then in grad school I might end up switching my direction once again to lord knows what, but if i can help it it will be involved with the sciences because that is where some of my most true feelings and passions reside, they excite me, are dynamic, logical and honestly make my reality feel more r e a l. Now don't get me wrong past self. future self and all other conversions of the same self (thats me bitches) I don't think im inadaquate or lacking, but rather not able to balance the intense workload while achieve in wrestling, or in this year, not either. However, murphys law anticipates such things so i just roll with it and take my punches as they come, I have a pretty friggen hard nose and an even harder forehead, so it better be tyson throwing the blows, because i refuse to fall easily.
Extra-lifal situwashons
So I'm trying to meet new people and grow into the man I want to become, Im leaving myself open and trying to expand my mind. I have a lot to say here but theres about six assholes sitting next to me being assholes talking talking and talking and talking and talking just being total dolts, now YES I know thats what they are programmed to do and i have come to expect it out of them t just honestly disheartens me to watch who could be upright decent humans, fall, delude themselves and change into these fuckenn monsters.
Date posted: August 2, 2007, 12:37 pm
Current mood: mental
How are I doing?
— lets start by saying this much, I just received my test scores, did much better than my first time taking the thing (in the math class I'm currently taking), my loan isn't clearing yet, I'm begining to worry, I REALLY need that money. besides that, I'm middle way, the yin and the yan of my day I suppose, however, the ultimate problem, the buzzkill of my mednial universe swings like a blade on a pendulum and is coming eearily close to my neck, that is, in three hours i'll be enjoying another lovely remdition of rip my head off and rip others heads off in wrestling practice. How lovely. And before that wonderous activity i'll be doing homework for at least two - three solid hours. So thats definetly not a plus.
a funny story I believe needs to be written down. So I'm going over to the wrestling house to have a beer with my friends and relax a bit after the week had finally ended, I go inside, am warmly greeted and have a great time. About two hours after arriving, I'm becoming awfully sleepy, and decide it would be best for me to take my leave, not drunk, but not exactly sober. I begin my bike ride on a bike that isn't mine. Wait? What? Yes, the bike I drove over on had be lifted, to add onto that, the theif was considerate enough to leave me hot pink/ magenta ask the queer eye for a straight guy guy's, bike that has absolutely no breaks, and most of the gears decidely won't work. Alongside that, I need to drive home on a very busy road, on a bike I don't know with a lack thereof of brakes, AND the tire is oversized so it really stiffels progress on the bike. Needless to say, I made it home on my newly aquired bike, which by the way wasn't mine to be taken, it was a friend of mine whom I now owe $50 to, (jake).
As I said, I cannot stress enough how badly I'm hurting for cash right now, I am so broke I couldn't afford to pay attention, and to a literal exact, this is true. Literal exact, wonderfully awkward yea? Well screw it, I'm not an Englische majer anymere.
Seldom seen, always there.
Sean moth**fu**** clair.
Date posted: September 17, 2007, 10:00 pm
Current mood: mental
hello.
There is much work to be done, and how terrible it is. I have been reading chapter after chapter for my genetics and my chem, math being my weakest subject and I have managed to ignore it completely. My course material is fun, but I have to say its far more difficult namely genetics then my prior classes, not too surprising, wrestling has been tough too, due to the fact that I have been working double time to get my weight down, beyond that we are attempting some passive eugenetics insofar as the team is concerned, by which I mean a process to weed out those who shouldn't be around has been initiated. coupling that with the alpha weight (the weigh in certifications and hydration test for NCAA); thats this friday, however, this saturday will be a good one, once I make my certification I have another whole month before I need to make my target weight of 133. We have been doing sprints in the morning, following suite, tomorrow morning will be another morning sprint, I will then do a workout after class at 10:40 (if I can find someone) and another at 4. Then homework at night, fun!
I have completely lost poetry in the daze that is my life right now, which is sad, I have a lot more I'd like to say, but for now I will limit myself to this small portion, because, I have much to do before bed.
Date posted: December 4, 2007, 2:28 pm
Current mood: mental
The year is fast closing and wrestling season tightens its grip on my life for the next few months. Competition is getting tougher, and our practices and work outs progressively do too. As this semester winds down I feel my grades are but a shadow of what they could and really should be. I have a wrestling match on thursday so hopefully sometime thereafter or after out matches in Ky. I don't have much else to say of yet.
Date posted: December 17, 2007, 1:16 pm
Current mood: nerdy
Hello again self and others, if you others exist. This is my annual report of how things have been going.
School
In school. hmm, well for starters we had a final in chemistry that could slay a demon, I was fortunate enough to make it out of that final with my head still attached, however, I cannot say that a C avg in the class is good, I can comfort myself in knowing it could have been a lot worse, as that final was ridunkulous. In such a degree that, we weren't taught a good many things present on the final, now when I say this you bastard naysayers might contend to dissagree, and more power to you, but shove that up your ass for right now, because the fact of the matter is multiple voices stated the same opinion typically means dynamic leadership, terse understanding grants wrong leaders righteous followers, or the case here a homogenous opinion set. The way the calcuations were set up was not as we have been taught, questions about angles of bonding in certain heterodimer molecules, which we weren't taught, equations conjumbled and clusterfucked, when all year we were taught a specific, (and useful methodology for solving chemistry problems,) which was completely averted whenever this final came around as we weren't allowed to use calcs so, these complex equations were used and you had to pick the best possible equation for a problem, however, when you're not taught how to approach the problems in the same the standardized test would have us do it, that makes solving the problems virtually impossible. I won't lie to you when I say i guessed like a champ, I mean there was some inherent understanding leading me to cogent answers, however, I most certainly guessed on a butt load. Genetics is approaching and math as well. I think I can still leave math with a B, genetics might have to settle for a C unfortunately, but thats the breaks, its a tough class and the first test beat my ass. The third one did too in all sincerity. I like my professor, however, his lecture style is sometimes ethcy and ecclectic, leading some ideas and themes tossed assunder and dismantled because I / or my peers weren't able to fully grasp conceptual understanding.
Wrestling
I wrestled again on Sunday and had NU. My opponet metzger if that the proper spelling we split matches earlier in the season, 1:1 and sunday I edged him. I did so fairly convicingly too, so much so that twice he was a deshovled mess on the mat, I thought I'd rip that guys shoulder out of place, as he didn't want to turn, I was then dealt an unfair card as the ref stopped the turn on grounds of potentially dangerous, which I can see, however, he didn't find it to be terribly aggregious until the fellow start balling. I had him bellow a scream nonparallel in the room of screams and loudness(es) thats a word damnit! It felt good to dominate him, I feel like my wrestling is really coming along, I still have some strides to be made however, I am doing all the right things and will continue to do so until I have played all my cards and the results are in. My coaches have been aiding me in my progression, they are pleased with where I am currently and are taking progressive steps to assure I continue my asscent, they are all very wonderful and I am blessed to be around during such an enticing and exciting time in EMU wrestling history.
Thats about all I have for now, I should be going I need to do a little bit more studying for genetics before my wrestling practice, PEACE AND CHICKEN GREASE!
A diseaced man o war
Date posted: December 2, 2007, 10:31 pm
Current mood: outlandish
I have been neglecting this thing as I typically do from time to time due to the influx of work and lack of motivation. I am currently attempting to sort through a deluge of personal problems, which I can obviously no longer entail here as some choice individuals will read and poke fun at my downs. Suffice it to say that its nothing insurmountable or entirely new to be honest to myself and you the reader, I just find myself anxious to write here the place where I can, but some folk find it hilarious to read my writing, the sort of hilarious that laughs at you, not with you to be crystal clear.
So this is my first step of many to dilute my yesterdays mistakes with tomorrows triumphs, one among many to come.
Grades
My grades are sub par at best, most everything I do right now and have been doing have been sub par, sadly- I have only what will and might that was granted to me through my valor and natural propensity for whatever it might be. As of now my genetics class, although intensely interesting, its very difficult, such being the case I find my grades faltering. Its around a mid c to hopefully higher. My chemistry, is a high C which I intend on making a B. My math is also a C, I believe that will also become a B with some luck and hard work. My blow off class is nearly an A and I hope to get that A.
wrestling
I have been using my coaches to the full advantage, or insofar as I can see. I believe I have made choices which will affect me positively; my coaches teach and provide insight to where I might be able to improve. For example i have tightened my neutral, my bottom is about the same as always, and top is improving, not yet but I believe it can and will!
I have a menagerie of issues so far as social shit is concerned, nothing new; I am irresponsible, that being the case I have overdrawn now on two count em' two bank accounts. How I manage such things truly amazes me and perpetually kicks the living shit out of my nads and pocket book in general, however, I have oen stint of light breaking through the rocks and tumult which have so thoroughly covered me, breaking through cracks and spaces they cannot fill, voids so small and insignificant purity and goodness might pour through, in this example that goodness is the idea that I have most of my Christmas shopping done, so I can officially belate my planned suicide until next Christmas season as I've managed to sanely through this one.
now tell me, why is the hell has Christmas been so rummaged by the piracy of commercialization of Christmas, it makes me sick in the gut, however, this is the season as they claim, instead of devoting ourself to Jesus, we falter beneath the ginormous sales and fixate our eyes on some alluring prize. It just makes me sick, but this talk is pointless as most of my other polemics found through-out this side, I an ardent believer in the idea of fuckitisms, so I will relax and realize I cannot change things so massive and PANdemic. So goodbye.
Date posted: August 14, 2007, 5:49 pm
Current mood: overjoyed
Class
class today was bush..
bushleague, but the happy news is its only 1 of three I have left, including another day of a test. Then I'm free.
wrestling
Our new coach, coach bolyard if thats the proper spelling has really been helping everyone tighten up their game with some fresh new moves and some really good support in the room. He is most certainly relegating the exact knowledge and presence into the room that he should be as an assistant coach in a D1 program. My coach has been able to do more managerial work due to his hiring of some fresh young talent and take the reigns of the team as it should being the head coach. he has set a very tough regement for us this year with the teams we face, however, the toughest competition is the compeititon that makes you the toughest, SO FUCK IT, BRING IT ON. The fact of the matter is, by that time I'm going to be at my proper weight and mean as hell. So whoever wants to step out on the mat with me best understand that they are only a victem of the 21 years i spent on this Earth. My weight is a bit too heavy and precarious yet, but I will certainly work on that in the time to come, and hopefully in good time I can find my weight to be about 140 which is my cert weight I need to make.
thats it for now
Oh and I found that damn key, said my DEAR SAINT ANTHONY PRAYER, which is single handedly found so many of my lost items that I cannot even iterate here how thankful I am of my faith and knowledge that a higher power must exist, I'm not that ignorant, and if I am let me placate myself in the idea that something bigger is there for me.
reassurance
I'm out peace and chicken grease
Yours.
Date posted: August 20, 2007, 11:01 am
Current mood: overjoyed
I'm happy because of everything that has been falling into place so deftly. From the fact that my last class is tomorrow, I have bought almost everything for my room and am moving in on the 25th, 6 days away. Getting my kitten soon, and am shooting for about 75 hours at my job, between two jobs at the same location so 40 and 35. Over this weekend i already put in 42 hours, and am hoping after my final tomorrow I can have 2-3 days to put in another 30 some. With that I stand to make near 700. Plus the fact that I may get more hours, this is just my estimates.
home
Jake has been gone which is nice because having another person at such close proximity with you so often can really be bothersome. Julie just came up this past weekend, and hung out with me on Friday, then went to her orientation on saturday before driving home. speaking of driving, due to jakes immense kindness I was allowed to use his car for food shopping, and whatever else I need within reason, having a car is needless to say amazing. Bike riding is just fine, but out in the elements as have been present this past week, its simply trecherous. no friend of mine to be sure. I have a lot of napping/studying/and working out to do this day. So I should be going. Goodbye!!
Date posted: September 20, 2007, 8:16 pm
Current mood: sick
I am tired, I have a buttload of homework to do, which I won't be doing, and am down to my appropriate weight. ialimbu si eth nsame ghrouth chwhi I shcompliac lal gsinth won; sadly, but in any evebt now is the time for action, so I will act as I must. I was recently diciplined by coach, ym cytenla will be my very end, he has told me, if I miss again lli selo eynmo, no ntcremein has been ednouncan. Any is too much tho, so now I must straighten my act up a bit and fix my faults.
School and a bit more wrestling.
Tomorrow is finally the time for weight certification, not much by way of practice, just a little rollin 'round at 3 then certs at 4, after that I will bust out some hw then have a real fun weekend, sunday I will bust out my prelab and do some more problems for genetics. Chem is on the backburner for now since I had my first quiz in there today, I did decent I think. Two math quizzes down too, 10/10 and somewhere in the neighborhood of 7/10 on my next one. My one online class a dietetics course is pretty easy, the other a mngt course, should be easy but my professor makes things difficult, and she seems rude and uncompromising, so she'll make things difficult when they don't need to be. A general blowhard.
Goodbye I know its sudden, but I am tired of typing.
Date posted: August 13, 2007, 1:15 pm
Current mood: stupid
school
Well in school i have not been living up to what I should be. On my first test as listed before, I did horribly, this past test I was set to take didn't go that much better, but it did go better. As of now, if I can get a c on the final test I can possible come out with an 83%, a 70% flat isn't bad considering most of the material we'll be tested on I'll know down PAT, with just a few new bits which won't be very much because the professor wants to get everything we already convered on the last test in. I feel semi confident about this final test, so long as I put in a solid 5-6 days studying I should do well.
Living
I'm currently still living with jake, and I have screwed up as of late. You see, I have misplaced my key like a moron, and now when he is out of the house due to my irresponsibility he asks that I be out too, which isn't too big a deal as i just sit at the library all day and chill. It sucks because, I can't even blame him for being mad, I screwed up badly. After that screw up in the same day, I left his computer on top of mine, which is a huge no no, as the processor within the computer generates a magnetic field which could counteract each other and ruin the harddrives. So he is pissed about that too, plus the simple fact that I am a pain in the ass at times and have been as of late. I left the playstation on his tv for an hour + which can I suppose screw up an older TV set which he has many a time bitched about, although I'VE NEVER had one problem with this, its his tv, so I will comply. He will be leaving for California in two days now, I am going to do my best to incoveience him no more and send him off as this might be the visit where he and jenice are engaged, IT BETTER BE, but I don't like to ever count my chickens. With that, he is under a shitload of stress and I have helped him not a bit with that. But once he leaves I'll either find my key or i'll make him a new one then I'll be moving with drew on the 25th and start anew.
This weekend
It was a blast, this friday I went to a party with drew at his cousents and met a few cool people there, woke in the morning and went out to eat, came back to ypsilanti and got some stuff for the next day and that night, because I decided to stay over drews house so as to avoid jake a bit more and to bond with my soon to be roomate. His family had steak, which was fantastic, and then we went to his younger brothers scrimage for football. That night we went rock climbing at the gorgeous girls house and then road on a zipline which was simply amazing. The next morning we went to church at 8 which was a damned good idea as I haven't been for sometime now. After getting back we departed for cedar point, which was my first and most certainly not my last time going there, it was pretty fun. Some of the rides there were absolutely insane. Drew covered my tab until my loan clears as I have NO money. I was going to buy a desk and an entertainment center off this girl, Sara, but she has been such an ignorant bitch about settling on times and negoiating money that I have since decided to not buy off her. So Drews family has a card table which I'll use as my desk and entertainment center until I can work something out. When we got back from cedar point we slept at drews place, he then dropped me off for class in the morning before he headed to work, now I'm just passing some time on allpoetry and on this journal until I walk back to the house tonight to prepare for lifting, once thats done i'll probably go back and start cleaning up the house with jake, so tomorrow night we can have a fun night before he goes away to visit jenice. My loan should be in today, if thats the case, I'll have my computer in about 9 days from now which is astounding and very much a necessary thing, as my computer is officially shot, I need a new one and quick.
Out for now
Thats about it, I have some things to do then I'm headed back around 3-3:30 to prepare for lifting at 5. Later!!
Yours, idiot!
